It had to happen sometime, and last night was the night. Makes sense. At a month in, this is generally a prime time for freaking out in a relationship. And no, it wasn’t me doing the freaking out. And, to be fair, the freak-out was very adult and measured, and I think we actually ended up having a good conversation about fears and anxieties, and it only took like 25 minutes at the beginning of what was otherwise a very enjoyable evening.
The short version:
The Dude: I love you, this is going too fast, we need to get to know each other better, I don’t want to be crushed like a bug on a windshield, I think we should see each other less and I want to spend more time with you (even though that makes no sense at all), really this has nothing to do with you and I’m just stressed about other stuff, no – I really do want to see you this weekend (after I suggested that we need not), you’re going to be gone the whole weekend before Christmas?!?! I don’t like that…. but you’re coming back on Christmas day? I want to see you that night! Are we good?
Me: Yep, we’re good. (I did say more than that, but as this was his freak-out and not mine, what I said isn’t terribly material at this moment.)
And I think we are good, actually. I mean, he clearly is deeply confused, but then I’m not NOT confused, so that’s fine. But I shall be backing off for the time being. I mean, I’m still in love and all, but if he is interested in slowing things down, then that’s what he’ll get. We’ll see how he likes that.
And I also might have absconded with his favorite Steelers long-sleeved t-shirt, and I don’t intend to return it, in spite of claims that I made to the contrary.
This is some seriously entertaining shitte on your blogge! Hey: do your cattes like The Dude?
I aim to please
Also, if one can’t laugh about this crap then the only alternative would be to get very, very cranky about it.
Mr. Stripey likes him fine, but then Mr. Stripey likes everybody. The Man-Kitty has stopped glaring at him constantly, but he continues to remain aloof and to indicate that he could attack him at any moment. The Man-Kitty is a tough customer, and I will say that I trust his instincts more than I trust Mr. Stripey’s.
At least you are recognizing this for what it is and not taking it as motivation to freak out on your own. I admire that quite a bit!
Fie, that’s partly because I’ve been dealing with this shit with guys on and off for the past 22 years of my life. It’s more boring than anything else. (Also, to be totally honest, I obviously have freaked out a little otherwise I wouldn’t have stolen his favorite shirt from him. But I do at least have the presence of mind to be passive aggressive, as opposed to, as HS BFF said, “go batshit crazy,” which I have been known to do in this sort of situation.)
The next time you’re at The Dude’s place, you should secretly replace the Steelers jersey with a Ravens one. That will totally endear you to him.
Fuck the Ravens. Art Modell broke my heart when the Browns became the Ravens. I can’t love again.
You should write some football postes. That would be much more entertaining than about how much you hate/love your fucken students.
My primary concern in all this personal stuff has been the happiness of the Man-Kitty, whose war with the Interloper longtime readers remember well.
Ha! ELP, it is worth noting that on first meeting, MK did appear to tar The Dude with the same brush as the Interloper, but he did manage to hold back on attacking (although there was a small stalking incident that did make The Dude uncomfortable, so it’s not that MK has lost his zeal for attack so much as that he enjoys a longer period of intimidation these days).
Cattes are totally fucken hilarious.
About six weeks after we met, the husband and I had what we refer to as “The Eighteen-Hour Breakup.” We joke about it now, eighteen years later.